Sunday, April 15, 2012

Supernova to the heart

And without warning, there was a supernova that come flying past and bursting into your life. . . There you were alone, hopeless, and distorted by all that life had beaten you with. 

I don’t mean to whine, but life hasn’t exactly been very easy, much harder than the normal lot in life.   Being homeless for instance, I truly believe most people couldn’t cope with loosing that last, lingering sense of security.

I guess this is one reason that I am so thankful for the little bits of happiness or in this case of my life the very large bits of happiness that have finally been thrown my way. 

“I threw a wish in the well,Don't ask me, I'll never tell looked to you as it fell,and now you're in my way “

I have known Orion for about a year or so now.  I met him in the most unlikely ways, at least to me.  I had hard rules against the getting overly attached to anyone from a sillyass video game, but alas, it happened without my knowing. 

Silly how a game can do something so unexpected. . . Thank you World of Warcraft. . . . .

From the day that I met Orion, I always knew I wanted something just like him, but never thought it was him --- It wasn’t possible after all?  He was perfect in all the words that he said and his laugh made me….want to smile?  Something that was not frequently found in my house, especially not on my face! 

How is it that you can have loved someone for a thousand years and want to love them a thousand more without having known them for a thousand years?  I never believed in the whole soul mates thing, not really.  Had I come close to this feeling?  Sure.  Robert was a very close to this feeling, but I didn’t love him from the moment I met him --- Not like Orion. 

“I have died every day

Waiting for you

Darlin' don't be afraid

I have loved you for a Thousand years

I'll love you for a Thousand more

And all along I believed I would find you

Time has brought Your heart to me”

I loved him before I knew I loved him and that’s insane to say --- Or maybe I just another crazy girl.  I honestly couldn’t have hand crafted a better match for me.  He is everything I wished for and everything I had forgotten to wish for.   

I have doubted every man I have ever been with;  I have felt inadequate and often unwanted, but Orion never makes me feel that way.  He has that kind of unconditional love that everyone needs and craves from a lover and a companion. 

Sometimes I believe that we have mates that we see time and time again and Orion is mine.  I looked for him in all the wrong places and at the very last moment before I left to go look in another time he was there to save me.  He didn’t just save me, he jumped down with me instead of sending for me.  He knew and He came.  How?  I don’t know, not could I ever explain.   

In essence, I am thankful. I am happy. I am more than ecstatic and never could have even dreamed such a grand thing into existence.   I am just a simple girl, broken, bruised and torn by the past and he is. . . Everything I ever needed.  How did *I* get so lucky? 

*takes a breathe*

That’s enough for now….. Open-mouthed smile